aardvark-shaped guillotine!

Goodness me an aardvark-shaped guillotine would be weird-looking. I mean, would the "aardvark's" jaws be the part with the blade? Or...never mind.
Thankies to ThaReeza for the last post, it was enlightening. It also showed that, yes, she DOES exist! (Steph, the lone commenter thus far, thought that it was a ruse just because...well, I'm me.)
ThaReeza brought out the funniest part of me out into the open where it could fend for itself in the land of the Wolves of the Jokes that Fall Flat on their Faces, but I've started to scare them away a little more with my other blog entries, which I might put here! Jubilation! I approached ThaReeza originally seeking a voice teacher because she is so awesome at that kind of performing thing in general, but then we got to talking and she cracked me up and we made drama character profiles of people with friendly dismembered noses and the rest is slightly bloggable history.

Now let's get this blog entry warmed up, shallies?

When the mongoose leapt from the zamboni, I knew that it was trouble - big trouble. For example, it was holding one of those guns that shoot bad clichés at you like gelatin. Also, it was masked and was foaming at the mouth.
"There ain't no room in this town fer de both'a uss," it said to me.
I stopped asking random passersby if they had spare cantaloupes. "Are you a turkey or are you a SPONGE?!"
It proceeded to pull little berries named Wanda out of its manpurse. The mongoose clearly was not happy about being a dingo eye, but then came out a sauna.
It was a big sauna.
"Hey, Larry, I was wondering if you wanted to go grab a fottie (ha ha fattie) quesadilla with me?"
"You rock star squirrel!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!"

Such was my story segment. Now I'm going to type more.
There is no such thing as a grand green yuppie, because all of the little hippies don't like the way that they sing about alcoholic Smurfs. (Smurves?) It's not that they don't like the "GREAT MERCIFUL CRAP-SHIT!" of Chef Brian; it's just that they think that "ECHIDNA" would fit more easily in the "I ARE PANT" phrase.

BERT! FETCH ME MY MOP!

You never know just who is waiting beyond your door, particularly if you're sitting on it and lying with a possibly electric eel in your eye...I hug thee, mango!